And if the darkness is to keep us apart
And if the daylight feels like it's
A long way off
And if your glass heart should crack
And for a second you turn back
Oh no, be strong
Walk on, Walk on.
...
What you got they can't steal it
No they can't even dream it
Walk on, walk on...
stay safe tonight
And I know it aches
And your heart it breaks
You can only take so much...
Walk on...

-'Walk On' U2

From one of my favorite songs at one point in time. I used to run to this song, long lonely hours on the treadmill at Bally Total Fitness. A friend of mine and I were obsessed with this CD (U2's "All You Can't Leave Behind) which did more than anything else to fend off private demons the both of us had. We even wrote up a contract where the two of us would stay relatively "sober" of our vices despite the irresistable, heartwrenching, damaging pulls of them at times. Songs remind you of phases of life, and this one always reminds me of then, when I was clawing myself into a mess I'd gotten into trying to make sense of what had happened and what it was all for. Maybe one day, I'll know.

"...You've got to leave it behind...you've got to leave it behind."

In memory of those runs, I'm registering for the NYC Ford Triathlon this coming July. This time, I'll be running to something instead, I guess, of away from it